Perhaps it's time for a parking test

PUBLISHED: 12:19 16 November 2006 | UPDATED: 13:36 04 May 2010

IT seems more and more obvious that as soon as a lot of people get a driving licence they lose the use of their legs. Otherwise, why is it that if they need to nip into a take-away or a convenience store they have to park as close as possible? Sometimes t

IT seems more and more obvious that as soon as a lot of people get a driving licence they lose the use of their legs. Otherwise, why is it that if they need to nip into a take-away or a convenience store they have to park as close as possible? Sometimes the empty parking space on the other side of the road is too far for their poor little legs to carry them and they have to stop on the nearest double yellow line (parking is too grand a word for it).

Apart from being a display of mindless

selfishness and laziness and causing inconvenience to others trying to get from one end of the High Street to the other there's no major harm done. Where there could be a problem is when the vehicle is parked at the top of Brook Dam Lane, just off the T-junction with the High Street. It could cause a bit of a problem for a hurrying fire engine if a car blocks its passage while its owner is buying another can of lemonade. Still, why worry if someone's house is burned to the ground if you save a couple of steps.

Luckily there wasn't a problem over bonfire weekend, but it could have been a very different story. Perhaps a parking test tacked on to the driving test might be the answer.

Treat your ears

ON Saturday, you can remind yourself of another of the reasons to be proud of Soham. The Soham Comrades Band is performing in concert at Fordham Church. With the acoustics of St Peter's and the expertise of the players it should be a memorable evening. Among the pieces in the programme are I've Got You Under My Skin, The Fordham and Staploe March 2000, Amazing Grace and one piece that is sure to get the blood racing of any fan of The Lone Ranger, The William Tell Overture. I'm not sure which member of the band will be taking the part of Tonto, but I'm sure they'll do it well.

INFO: Tickets are available from Mr Wood on 01638 720328, Jenkins Electrical of Fordham, Cloisters Antiques of Ely, and Soham Books in Soham and Newmarket. £5 in advance or £6 on the door.

I can't see the point

I SAW a fairly useless sign the other day as I was driving down the M11. As there was a little bit of mist over the fields the signs were lit up with the word 'FOG'. On the face of it this is quite a good idea, but if you think about it, it's actually fairly daft. If you can see the sign it's not foggy, and if it is really foggy, you can't see the sign, so why is it there?

From the horse's

WE seem to have gained a new pen pal from The Grange lately. Apparently the note I have before me saying that the district council will only replace up to a maximum 10 sacks means that it is only a temporary measure. I wonder why it didn't say that in the first place. Perhaps we need to contact Doris Stokes to interpret notes from the council in future.

Meanwhile, there is little evidence of extra cleaning services from the money they are saving in Witchford. Some bright spark left some broken glass on the path in Sand Street recently. Broken glass on the path is an obvious hazard to pedestrians, especially the children going to and from St Andrew's School, but can easily damage the paws of pet dogs out for their constitutionals. The street cleaning in the High Street/Churchgate Street part of town is excellent and has been for some time, but it would be nice if the area could be extended at times like this. As it was one of the residents did her bit and cleaned it up for the good of all.

Memo. . .

JUST a short note to the Standard's headline writers. Last week you put a banner over this column saying, 'Soham is a 'deprived village'. Actually, Soham is a town and we can get a bit sensitive if people call it a village.

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